A Note on the Magic of Right Now Aaron has said to me that I’m a “girl that just needs her freedom,” and when I ask him what’s that supposed to mean he says, “You always want to bury your feet into the ground no matter how cold it is and you crave getting outside with no constraints. You were made to be a part of the world.” Once again, I felt so seen and honored that someone I love so deeply sees me in a way that I’ve always felt. I highly suggest that you mindfully choose a partner that makes you feel this way, but we’ll save relationship chat for another day.Moving on, it’s been on my mind a lot lately as to what it means to be someone who feels most themselves out there and how we can cope + stay at peace in here. There’s the usual things I do: Take a walk with Stabes (my sidekick Corgi for those who are new pals), have my weekly call with my girlfriends on Zoom, and Aaron + I have weekly Friday date nights that we take turns planning. But what do those things all mean on a deeper level? They mean that I’m not pausing my life during this time — as my therapist so eloquently put it, I won’t look back on this time and think it all blurred together to amount to nothing special — I’m creating new memories that make me feel alive, they just look differently than planned.While I’m not sitting outside at a cafe listening to the birds sing, I’m running along an empty beach barefoot in the sand. While I’m not gathered in the living room of one of my friends, sharing a bottle of wine, I’m seeing their beautiful faces in the glow of my laptop screen; connecting over books we’re enjoying, the current state of our mental health and laughing over unprecedented situations we’ve gotten ourselves into. While I’m not on my planned New York City trip with Aaron, in the bustling streets of the city, feeling that electricity you only feel among other souls, we’re still dancing in the kitchen, generating our own special spark, creating experiences that will strengthen our relationship. And that makes me feel alive — both out there and in here.Some days, just getting out of bed seems like the only thing I can muster, but when I feel alive — most like myself — that’s where my personal magic is curated. What about yours?
Leave a Reply